


Watatsumi

by ninomiwaifu



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Drama, Explicit Sexual Content, Inspired by a Movie, Love, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2018-06-01 15:07:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 16,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6525169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninomiwaifu/pseuds/ninomiwaifu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ninomiya Kazunari; the only son of Ninomiya Kento, member of the former kuge house head and his wife; Saga Kazuko is indirectly forced to marry into the Nijou family; one of the biggest families of the Fujiwara dynasty in order to maintain the family wealth and status. But everything changes when he meets the poor painter Ohno Satoshi.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is strongly based on the movie Titanic, so there are lots of similarities (or maybe too much, sorry XD).
> 
> Watatsumi is the Japanese dragon king and ocean god (Umm, found it on Google, so correct me if I'm wrong).  
> Daiya: Diamond.
> 
> Rated M for future chapters
> 
> Just needs to explain some points so this is going to be a bit long:
> 
> * The story happens in 1912 during Japan and Korea's annexation treaty from 1910 until 1945, I just did brief research about it so forgive me if any information aren't precise or correct.
> 
> * During Meiji period (1868-1912) the Japanese society witnessed major changes after the Shogun resignation and new nobility ranks were established. The peerage of the Empire of Japan known as the 'kazoku' was divided into five ranks: Prince or Duke, Marquis, Count or Earl, Viscount and Baron; in order from highest to lowest (not as low, but in the ranking itself). Nino's parents come from the second rank; Ninomiya Kento and Saga Kazuko (Ninomiya here is fictional but the Saga family actually existed as a part of a samurai clan group - please forgive me; it's fiction after all). Nino's fiance; Nijou Ken, comes from the first and highest rank (Nijou is also an existent aristocratic family group). The Ninomiya family owned lands in Korea but after the father's death, they decided to associate with the Nijou family in order to maintain their noble status, moving back to Kyoto, Japan.
> 
> *Ohno's parents are workers migrating to Korea in the late 1900's.
> 
> *In this story, homosexuality is totally accepted by the society; as Nino is engaged to another man.
> 
> *I don't know if I need to mention this but I REALLY mean no offence to any Koreans or Japanese or anyone mentioned in this story; I'm just using historical facts to make the story more realistic. All the info I used are from Google and Wikipedia.
> 
> I've been planning to write this since I saw this Ohmiya moment in Hawaii Blast (http://miyuki-arashi.tumblr.com/post/116521026182/arashi-blast-in-hawaii-cute-ohmiya) and finally managed to gather my power to do it.
> 
> English is not my native language, so forgive any mistakes.
> 
> Enjoy and comment *kisses*  
> 

The old man slowly opened his eyes; seeing the usual pale white hospital ceiling above him, sighing heavily.

He hated hospitals, that is much understandable, but at least he just has a weak heart, he thought glancing at empty bed next to him. His former room mate; Honda-san who suffered from what doctors called kidney failure was barely breathing when they had to transfer him to the IC, leaving him to his room’s solitude.

Shutting his tired eyes again, he tried to recall the magical dream he was having. His heart suddenly clenched; a mixture of nostalgia and sorrow when he remembered the pair of gentle eyes looking at him, the worn out pants sitting before him, the slightly dusted hands holding the cheap yellow pencil and those slim long elegant fingers he adored so much; sketching.

A sudden faint knock on the door jolted the old man but he smiled; glancing at the wall clock announcing his granddaughter’s arrival. She was never late; 8 AM sharp, as always, he mentally noted.

The 24 years old woman; Kiko, was a resplendent newly hired journalist. After his own wife’s death, his son; Kiko’s father, moved to the United States after being offered a significant position in his company’s branch in New York, and took his wife and daughter with him. He still lives there, naturally, but Kiko; always attached to her grandfather, moved back to Kyoto to study at college and to take care of him. She also always had Kasumi; her childhood best friend and co-worker with her, and just like her friend, Kasumi was deeply fond of the old man too.

“Good morning!” Kiko greeted cheerfully from behind the enormous basket she was holding, and then the old man noticed that she wasn’t alone.

“Kasumi-chan too. Good morning.” He greeted his granddaughter’s best friend with a wide grin, trying to adjust his posture to sitting, but failing miserably. He giggled still, while Ayaka; his nurse for 5 years now, tsked and rushed to help him.

“Still stubborn, ne, oji-chan?” Kiko whined while placing the wooden basket – full of his favorite milk buns – on the bedside table. Kasumi grinned cheerfully and hugged the old man before pulling a chair and seating herself comfortably on it.

“You know I hate to be a burden.” He repeated for the nth time and Ayaka silently pouted, but the old man shot her a playful no offence look which made her pout deeper, but she just shook her head; preparing breakfast like every morning.

“I know, I know,” the young lady assured. “But, no offence, you’re already 100, old man, which means you should enjoy the bless of relaxing and letting others do things for you instead of exhausting yourself.” She resumed, earning an approving nod from Ayaka who placed the tray on the old man’s lap, shooting him a rather motherly stare.

He sighed, too lazy to respond and just focused on his food. Carrots again, he smiled, and slowly, his mind drifted away from the noisy chatter the ladies around him started about something he didn’t quite understand. Cell phones? What is that supposed to mean anyway?

Instead, he shifted his gaze to the window, wondering about the reason why his mind chose to recall those moments again and again since he woke up.

Not that he ever forgot, but well.

As he grabbed his chopsticks, Kasumi turned on the modest television in front of his bed, explaining something about a TV program broadcasting an interesting expedition.

“ _-and as you can see here, we can gladly mark the day as our team is ahead of uncovering the long awaited mystery-_ “ a man’s voice filled the room, resulting a small frown marrying the old man’s face. “Too loud.” He mumbled through his full mouth, partially to himself.

“We had an article about this, ne, Kiko?” Kasumi exclaimed, her eyes glowing excitedly at the screen while Kiko joined her, standing by the chair she was occupying; just between the bed and the TV.

Kiko hummed as the man from the TV resumed. “ _-earlier today, we discovered what appears to be a painting. Take a look at the date-_ “

A faint amazed gasp reached the old man’s ear, and while he shifted his old eyes to the screen, he abruptly dropped his chopsticks.

His heart beats raced, a gushing sensation squashed his insides furiously while his eyes glued themselves to the screen. He felt his insides twitch, ignoring the rest of the man’s remarks and his gaze scanned the said painting, astonished.

“Wow. This is endowed work.” Kiko commented, amazed, not noticing her old man’s stunned features. “An 80 years old painting that remained underwater. This could make a hit article.”

Kazumi hummed. “Do you think we could go along that expedition? I guess I can managed to get Maruyama-san’s approval; he would be interested in such story to boost the paper.”

“T-turn the volume up…” The old man finally managed to whisper, making the women shift their gaze at him; raising their eyebrows. “Oji-san?”

“Turn that up!” He repeated; louder this time and they silently shared a look while Kasumi slowly pressed the volume button.

The old man’s eyes scanned the painting, studying the half-naked features of the slim man being drawn; lying sideways, the prominent collarbones under that heavy looking necklace, the moles decorating the mysterious man’s chin. He still couldn’t believe his eyes as the man in the TV reported something about a missing diamond.

“-while we are still in the hunt of the Nijou-daiya that was lost for over 80 years following the sinking of the Watatsumi-“

“Oji-san, are you ok?” Kiko questioned, concern covering her face but the old man didn’t respond, instead, with his eyes still glued to the TV, he mumbled.

“I need to speak to that man.”

Kiko and Kasumi shared a look before the latter complied. “I’m already planning to contact Maruyama-san-“ She assured but he cut her.

“Not him; I mean the man in the TV. I want to speak to him, now.” He demanded, ignoring the perplexed faces gaping at him.

“B-but why?” Kiko wondered, her voice faint as if she was afraid she was being inappropriate. The old man finally detached his eyes away from the screen, barely aware that they were a bit teary. So that’s why they’re concerned.

“Tell him I have information about the Nijou-daiya.”

_____________

His hand trembled holding the phone but he didn’t care, not that much anyway, maybe it’s just the effect of so much emotions hitting him all at once. Maybe they were never gone in the first place; just buried deep somewhere in his heart so that he would be able to survive without dealing with the misery.

But just the sight of that painting awoke those feeling as if they were still fresh; as if it was yesterday, not 80 years ago.

“ _This is Yamauchi Jacob speaking._ ” The man declared on the other side of the line and he took a deep breath; calming his racing heart.

“Hello Yamauchi-san.” He wasn’t surprised at the slight quiver in his voice as he resumed. “I was wondering if you had found the Nijou-daiya yet.”

There was a short silence, in which the old man could clearly imagine the other man’s abrupt expression and he couldn’t help but chuckle at the image.

“ _Okay,_ ” the man finally vocalized, a little curious. “ _You have my attention Mr…_?”

“Ohno.” The old man supplemented, smiling faintly. “Ohno Kazunari.”

“ _Okay Ohno-san, can you tell me about the man in the picture?_ ” The man inquired, sounding quite attentive.

With a short grin, Kazunari tightened his hold around the phone and sighed,  
doubtlessly replying.

“Of course, the man in the picture is me.”  
  



	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's back! (^o^)／
> 
> I can't believe it has been over a year since I posted the first chapter of this!
> 
> I had lots of information ready on my old laptop hardware to use for this, but unfortunately the p̶r̶e̶c̶i̶o̶u̶s̶ hardware crashed for 8 months until I learned from the technician that I can't retrieve the data I had on it.. Still didn't get over this news (╥_╥)
> 
> Anyway, I had to start again on this, especially when I received notifications on this story in the last week. Some people still read this, ne?
> 
> The story happens between the years 1912 and 1992; since Nino in the flashback was 20. Nino in 100 years old in the current setting. (Sorry, I fixed that in the previous chapter). The ship sank in the Sea of Japan on its way back from North Korea. Nino currently lives in a small city in Komatsu, Ishikawa, by the sea of course XD
> 
> I shamelessly *ehem* copied some lines from the movie from which this story is s̶t̶o̶l̶e̶n̶ inspired, just to give the readers the feeling I get when I watch the actual movie. XD Forgive me, nothing belongs to me, e̶v̶e̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶b̶o̶y̶s̶.
> 
> I'll try to update more of this, since I have a long summer break from work (being a school teacher is great!)
> 
> Enjoy.
> 
> Sorry for any language mistakes xx

Yamauchi Jacob raised his eyes, gazing dreaming at the noisy helicopter approaching their vessel.

To say he was excited is considered an exaggeration, according to his teammate; Saito. But he was still willing to risk it; to grasp even a scarce opportunity to seek any information about the diamond he spent half of his life hunting for it. It can possibly be a great waste of his precious time, but at this point he didn’t give a damn.

The helicopter got closer, its rotors loudly slaughtering the air around them. He had a hard time opening his eyes as he peered at the young man exiting the doorless exit, followed by two young ladies. One of them; with short straight jet black hair and pale skin turned around quickly, and he realized she was helping a wheeled chaired man off of the helicopter.

He was really old; no less than 90, which made his heartbeats berserk. It makes sense, if the man on the phone was truthful, then he should be about 94 years old. The man had significant pale skin, contrasted with his silver shiny hair framing his eldery face, his face decorated with dark moles, especially a bigger one on his chin. He also had broad bony shoulders and prominent collarbones peeking from his light blue dress shirt.

“Yamauchi-san?” The other young lady asked as she tried to tame her flying hair caused from the rotors. He nodded, feeling his throat dry.

“Are you Ohno-san?” He inquired.  
The girl shook her head. “I’m a friend. Arimura Kasumi, nice to meet you.” She added helpfully, shaking his hand. The short haired girl approached, pushing the wheel chair before her until they reached where the explorer was standing restlessly.

“Good morning, I’m Ohno Kiko, and this is my grandfather, Ohno Kazunari.” Kiko introduced, and Kazunari bowed weakly in his seat. 

“Welcome to the Sea Jewel. I’m Yamauchi Jacob, the head of this expedition. Let’s move and get you to your rooms, shall we?” He offered and they agreed, looking glad to shelter from the wind.

_________

Kazunari scanned the room quietly, his mind almost absent at the moment. 

He can still hear screams, shouts and water splash around him. The last time he stepped on a boat was then. He sighed, causing Kiko to glimpse at him.

She was about to speak but the man they met on deck appeared, followed by a chubbier smiling man.

“Are you feeling comfortable in your room, Ohno-san?” The slimmer man smiled assuring, watching Asumi place some picture frames on the bedside shelf. Kazunari nodded grinning, shifting his gaze to the pictures, mostly of his adulthood, others with his wife and son. He scanned them lovingly, closing his eyes for a moment. Images of a slim figure, holding a dusty worn bag across their shoulder, a gentle toothy smile met his eyes. He sighed, pulling himself back to where he was, ignoring how his heart clenched inside his chest at the memories. He felt his eyes tearing, wanting to curl in a corner and surrender to the feeling overwhelming him but he couldn’t. 

He had plenty of chances to do so in the past. And he did.

“I always love to travel along my pictures. They make me feel at home.” The old man explained, earning a raved look from the younger man. “Is there anything else I can do for you?” Jacob wondered.

“Oh yes,” Kazunari giggled, excited to remember the reason he was here. “I would like to see my drawing.”  
___________________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a short one, sorry xx


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short chapter, sorry :(
> 
> Well, I spent about 5 hours writing this one. I kept searching for such silly details as the fabric of couch back in the 1912, famous diamonds and similarities between Asia and Europe back then. 
> 
> In the story, Nijou Diamond is a part of the Orlov diamond; a diamond made for Russia’s Catherine the Great. The duke Nijou Ken; Nino’s fiancé, requested the necklace as a gift right before the sailing of the Watatsumi.
> 
> Orlov Diamond is real, but I have no idea about its origin, so the rest of the info is a work of imagination. Some sites say it was really originated from India. I just wanted something in Asia to make the story more realistic. 
> 
> I'll try to draw an illustration of the necklace later ^^
> 
> ** NOTHING IS MINE
> 
> Enjoy xx

_Delicate fingers holding the cheap black conté crayon, almond shaped eyes scanning the skinny creamy body lying transparently, cozy on the expensive brown floral silk couch._

_He closed his eyes; his heart beating roughly, nervously. A river of flowing emotions filling his chest with every single crayon stroke, with every gaze; scanning… scanning his nakedness._

“O-oji-chan..?” Kiko’s worried whisper made Kazunari open his -to his not so surprise- teary eyes. He cleared his throat, realizing he was shaking dreadfully.

“I… I’m okay, it’s just-”

“We need to go back to your room; you should rest.” Kiko interrupted firmly, turning to apologize to Jacob, who began to panic a bit.

“No!” Kazunari insisted. “I’m okay.”

“But-“

“NO!”

Silence hovered around the cabin. Kazunari took a deep breath; watching Jacob pull a chair to sit in front of the old man.

“Ohno-san,” He commenced cordially, still a curious smile decorating his lips. “Are you ready to go back to Watatsumi?” He proposed; placing a sound recorder on the table near them.

Kazunari nodded immediately, chuckling. I’m already there, he wanted to state. Shutting his eyes again for a moment, he leaned back comfortably, and listened.  
_____________________

“Back in the late 17th century, following the Russian-Indian agreement and diamond mines collaborations, and due to the Rebellion of 1857, many Indian nobles’ properties were confiscated or stolen, including numerous diamond mines around the country. In the early 1900’s, some businessmen decided to earn more profit by importing and exchanging stolen properties, including a famous diamond piece called the Orlov Diamond, which was cut and sold to antique seekers around the world.”

Jacob’s assistant; Saito, narrated with many pairs of eyes following him intensively.

“The diamond was traced back to India, and later sold Moscow. One of its pieces was imported by a Korean diamond manufacturer in 1912 following the request of a wealthy Japanese duke living in North Korea then; Nijou Ken.”

Kazunari flinched with the mention of the name, he swallowed, trying to focus on the story he never heard before, even though the diamond was, one day, his.

“Ken claimed to purchase the diamond and have it cut into a heart-shaped necklace; a special gift for his fiancé.” Jacob resumed, and then, his eyes landed on the smiling old man ahead of him. “You; Ohno-san.”

Gasps were heard in the cabin as Kazunari nodded. “It was a heavy hefty thing. I only wore it once.” He informed, pointing nostalgically at the painting resting in the tray.

“Meaning,” Saito exclaimed cheerfully, “if your grandpa is who he’s claiming he is, he was wearing the necklace on the day Watatsumi sank.” He added, grinning.

Kazunari shifted his gaze to Jacob, who looked like he won a Noble prize, kneeling in front of him. “Which makes you my new best friend, Ohno-san.”  
____________________________


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep posting short chapters, sorry. xx
> 
> As much as I'm not happy with the second part of this chapter, here you go :)
> 
> sorry for any mistakes.

_Screams… Everywhere around them was filled with splashing water, screams and shouts. People running over the unknown, others trying to help, other just standing there; panicking. Some were desperately praying; hanging firmly and helplessly onto the wise priest, who was, despite the mess, trying to remain composed; just to give those around him some faith… some hope._  
  
_Chaos._  
  
_A delicate hand held his firmly, pulling him through the panicking figures and broken metal splattered around them. As much as it was a freezing night, he felt warm; safe somehow._  
  
_He knew he wasn’t alone. He knew he had a shoulder to hold on to, a hug to secure him; to assure him._  
  
_He was, for the first time in his life, feeling at home._  
  
_The other man turned his head, making sure he was following, despite the firm grasp around his small hand._  
  
_We have to find another way out. The sleepy voice declared, still focused on jostling through the third class passengers. He nodded still, and then the other man stopped behind a massive crowd; blocked by the metal gate. Guards were shouting at people to stay back, as if ironically telling them not to try to survive. As if-_  
  
_Kazu. The delicate voice called and he snapped out, realizing he was spacing out in such situation. He was scared; terrified more likely to describe it. The other man grasped both his shoulders firmly, shaking him._  
  
_We’ll be ok, Kazu. I’m here. I’ll save you, trust me._  
  
_The man kept reassuring him. And Kazu just smiled. I know, I trust you. He wanted to point out. He just smiled and gazed deeply into the other’s eyes, making him stop and stare back at him._  
  
_I trust you completely, Satoshi._  
  
__________________________________________________  
  
  
The breathtaking ship was seen through the distance. Ninomiya Kazunari watched it quietly, blankly from the carriage window. Chatter next to him didn’t interest him as it should normally do.  
  
As the elegant carriage approached the deck, workers cleared way, rushing to aid the first class family. Coming to a stop, Kazu closed his empty eyes; taking a deep breath.  
  
“Let’s go, dear.” The deep voice of his fiancé called, and while the carriage door was being opened for him, Ken was already there; reaching his manly hand for him.  
  
Holding the tail of his silky deep blue kimono, he took the offered hand, pushing away the grief filling his chest and stepped out of the vehicle, the massive ship came into full view.  
  
“Hmm,” Kazu hummed sarcastically. “I don’t see the fuss about this. It’s not that breathtaking, ne?” He added, taking the chance to slid his hand out of Ken’s hold, pretending to be busy with his personal maid.  
  
“Wait until you see it from the inside, dear. It even has a gym.” Ken defends, as if it was his home that was insulted. Kazu though didn’t seem to listen, which drew a disappointed look on the rich man’s face.  
  
“Your son is really hard to please, Kazuko-sama.”  
  
An elegant short woman appeared behind him. Dressed in a silky floral red kimono, hair tied back into a decorated bun, just smiles at him, looking part proud-part worried.  
  
Kazu followed his mother and fiancé to the main entrance, easily passing through the check up and inspection points. MONEY, his mind whispered pathetically, watching Ken shove couple of bills into the hands of every passing servant.  
  
He gazed, neutrally ahead of him, ignoring the twist in his guts as Ken took his hand, hooking it in his arm like any perfect couple.  
  
He knew he was a good looking man, elegant and well educated. His family name always gives the needed impression among high class. Outwardly, he was everything a fine young man should be, escorted deeper and deeper into the ship that seemed, for Kazu, a slave ship.  
  
To say he felt trapped was not enough to describe the situation. He knew though he had no choice; their family was losing their status since the Shogun resignation. They were smothered in countless dept. The only way out of being thrown penniless on the streets was getting married into another wealthy family like Ken’s.  
  
Kazu didn’t love him, it was obvious, but his mother didn’t really seem to mind, as long as money was involved. It made Kazu feel useless, backless. He knew, despite that, that Ken liked him, ever since the first day he lay his eyes on him at a dinner party a year ago.  
  
But all of that didn’t matter now. It was a painful reality; getting back to Japan, preparing for the wedding. He knew there was no way out, not in this life at least. ____________________________


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, yay.
> 
> I might not be able to update this week as I'm travelling, so forgive me. xx
> 
> Enjoy this -slightly- longer chapter.

Kazu stared at the canopy bed in the middle of his room. Everything around him seemed dull, plain. Maids were busy scrolling around the sweet; unpacking, making the area roomy while Ken was busy sipping at a glass of white wine.

A porter came into Kazu’s view; wheeling Ken’s private safe on a hand truck. The young man observed as Ken instructed the worker to put it in his wardrobe, of course after shoving couple of bills inside the man’s hand.

Kazu’s personal maid, Ayaka was busy hanging some of Kazu’s clothes in the wardrobe when Ken appeared; leaning on the door frame, smirking, still sipping at his wine.

“Everything seems brand new, fresh, ne Kazu-sama?” Ayaka smiled, glancing at the pleased Kazu who dropped gracefully of the freshly made bed. He hummed, inhaling the freshness, grinning sheepishly at the young lady.

“Thinking that I’m the first one to crawl under those sheets is-“

Kazu’s smile dropped when he suddenly noticed Ken licking his lips; gawking a bit lewdly at the young man. He blushed, shivering, feeling his cheeks burn. 

“Thinking I’ll be the first under those sheets too, is… exciting.” Ken almost whispered, his eyes scanning the exposed area of Kazu’s leg peeking out of his kimono. Kazu’s blush increased, sensing the awkwardness in the room. 

He wasn’t happy with his fiance’s obvious observation. His heart was rushing; snapping furiously inside his chest. He could feel his stomach in his throat while Ayaka cleared her throat nervously.

“Um… excuse me, Kazu-sama.” She mumbled, rushing out of the room to give them some privacy. Kazu wanted to scream at her; to beg her not to leave him alone with Ken. His blood pulsed as he adjusted his clothes, trying to shrink as much as possible as Ken dropped himself casually next to him.

“The first and only, forever.” Ken whispered, almost possessively, not intimately. Kazu forced a fake smile on his lips, gaping into space as the older man gripped his knee for a moment, as if assuring him that he belonged to him and him only before winking at him and leaving the room.

Kazu didn’t realize he was trembling until he heard his maid’s faint voice. “K-Kazu-sama…?”

The young man smiled, inhaling deeply hoping to erase the disgust he was feeling. He smiled at the worried face of Ayaka, nodding. “I… I’ll take a shower before dinner…” He declared, watching the lady nod, sympathy in her eyes before she moved to help him out of his kimono.

Life was unfair, ruthless and dull. He was a twenty years old man, yet his heart felt heavy, dusty. 

In the books he spent his life immersing himself in, life was colorful, blooming and full of love. That feeling of being above the clouds, of the heart dancing in delight, of seeing the one he loves as if he was rewarded the sea and beyond. Those were fairy tales, imaginations. In the life Kazu witnessed, it was money, always the same useless chatter, the same fake faces, trying to impress people that don’t matter to them. 

It was disgusting. Kazu chuckled, pathetically. And the scary part was, he knew there was only one way out.

______________________________

A 44 years old gentleman, introduced as Naohito Fujiki; Fuji.co shipbuilders company owner, joined them for dinner. Nice, handsome and humble, somehow seemed a bit different to Kazu, who was blankly staring at his plate. 

“Well,” Fujiki chuckled, obviously disliking the attention he was getting from the group. “I may have been the one who assembled it, but Mr. Kagawa here is the master mind behind it.” He informed, pointing at an older man seated at the head of the table. He was Kagawa Eiji, the owner of the ship; an arrogant-looking skinny man in his 50’s. Kazu kept listening to the man’s stories about how the glorious idea came to his mind and how he miraculously brought it into reality.

“… and here she is,” Slamming his fist in obvioustriumph onto the table. “brought by me into solid reality.” He chuckled.

“Looks like we missed an interesting conversation here!” At that moment, a cheerful voice commented. They observed as two extremely elegant looking men joined them. The one who talked; a tall slim young man, probably in his late 20’s, with silky light brown hair, combed fancy, a bright smile plastered on his handsome face. Following him came another slightly shorter fine man, also in his late 20’s, but looking more serious. He had strong features, with dark defined eyebrows and full lips. His dark hair combed neatly behind his ear. 

“Oh, a lot, I promise.” Kagawa laughed while both men joined them, The shorter man; introducing himself as Matsumoto Jun, pulled the seat for the other; his boyfriend Aiba Masaki who smiled lovingly at him before taking his seat next to him. 

Kazu observed them, a bit envy. They were introduced as a couple; both business men and married, but choosing to keep their names for business matters. They kept throwing passionate glances and smiles at each other, boldly holding each other’s hands on the table for everyone to see.

Trying to scratch out the agony filling his fragile chest, Kazu reached to light a cigarette while a waiter arrived to take their orders.

“You know I hate that, Kazu.” Kazuko complained, frowning at her son who blew some smoke in the air. Ken chuckled, glibly snatching the cigarette from his fiancé’s mouth and stubbed it out.

“He knows.” 

The table turned quiet as Kazu stared, almost unbelievable at the bud while Ken turned to the waiter, ordering food for both of them, not even bothering asking him what he likes to eat.

The young man caught Aiba’s raised eyebrow at Ken, while Matsumoto elbowed his husband, probably preventing him from throwing a comment.

“Umm… Who thought of the name Watatsumi, by the way?” Kazuko queried, trying to ease the tension surrounding the table. Kagawa chuckled when everyone glanced at him. 

“Oh yes, see, I wanted a name that both defines stability, power and size.” The man informed, his nose high and Kazu couldn’t then suppress his chuckle. All the eyes turned to the young man, who took a sip of his wine glass. “Kagawa-san, Do you know of Dr. Freud? His ideas about the male preoccupation with size might be of particular interest to you.”

Silence hovered heavily, while Naohito tried hard to hide his grin, Aiba chuckled openly at Kagawa’s dumb face. Ken turned to stare at his fiancé while Kazuko covered her mouth, embarrassed.

“What has gotten into you, Kazunari?”

“Excuse me; I need to take a walk.” Kazu informed, leaving his seat, waving his fiancé’s puzzled glare at him. 

He needed air. It felt as if the silliness of the conversation was choking the hell out of him. Everything sounded pathetic and superficial. He felt more like a fish out of water, struggling, screaming at the top of his lungs and no one was even glancing at him. 

He shakily exited the restaurant, cogs in his mind spinning roughly. The way out seemed dull and dark, but the young man knew he won’t be able to elope as long as Ken was there, guiding his as if he was a slave, as if no right to complain or state his mind. 

It was an endless parade of parties and cocktails, mindless narrow people, chatter. 

Feeling his eyes blurry, teary, Kazu vulnerably hurried, almost running along the B deck, cheeks streaked with tears. He wasn’t just feeling agony, but also anger, fury. His heart filled with mixed emotions, rage he didn’t even know where it came from. Not even caring about public display of affection, the man pushed passing people who stared, some out of shock, others sympathetically at him.

He’s determined; escaping from this cruel life is a must, even if it means leaving life itself.  
_____________________

Freezing breeze blew around the back deck. Stars blinking gloriously from the sky above in that cloudless night. 

A young man appears, almost running until he reaches the fantail, gasping, wheezing aloft, shaking from both cold and flowing emotions. 

Streaks of shiny tears smearing his pale cheeks, the young man stopped, catching his breath as his lost eyes scanned the area, breath hitched, his sobs getting louder and louder. He carefully, almost vulnerably crept towards the railing, gaping at the black water ahead.

Taking few deep breaths, Kazu suppressed his sobs, swallowing as he began hitching his red kimono up, grasping the railing as he started climbing over. His hands freezing but he didn’t seem to care, turning his body until he was hanging, facing blankness and chill. Massive propellers noisy, 60 feet below him, slashing through the black water beneath, the prolonged horizon seeming cruel and callous.

As he was leaning forward, still shaking, a calm voice reached his ear.

“Don’t do it, please.”  
___________________________________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I shamelessly copied Rose's comment about the size because, well, it fits our Kazu, and honestly, I couldn't come up with anything sarcastic like it. XD


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I last updated this 3 months ago!!
> 
> I'm so sorry *bows*
> 
> Written directly from my phone, this is not well prepared, forgive any mistakes.
> 
> I'll definitely post again soom, as the rest of this is still fresh in my mind. 
> 
> Enjoy xx

The young painter huffed out smoke from his mouth, gazing at the carpeted black sky above him.

Luck mainly played a part in his life events. Sometimes it abandoned him, cruelly, just like those times he was shivering in the hollow streets at night, cold and hunger eating his bony form.

Other days were brighter, blooming in a way he would have never guessed.

Just like his current situation.

Arriving at Shongjin wasn't planned. Ohno Satoshi barely planned any step during his wanderings to sell his paintings. During his 21 years of life, he learned to just go for the adventure, nothing gained but also, nothing lost. The young painter though, never imagined that his modest paintings would catch eyes of that extremely wealthy looking old lady. Honestly, he personally thought she was overreacting, but still, offering him the largest sum of money his eyes ever landed on, insisting on buying all the paintings he was selling, he could never decline such offer.

Maybe she was nuts, but Satoshi wasn’t complaining anyway.

Toma; his best friend and travelling companion, declared celebration that night. After months of struggling, they finally granted their tickets back home, on one of the finest ships out there. 

A celebration indeed, Satoshi chuckled. 

A 3rd class trophy, but again, no complains.

Satoshi sighed, dragging a longer puff of his skinny cigarette before blowing it out. Lying back on the wooden bench beneath him, his mind kept recalling flashes of his childhood. He barely had memories of his parents, loving and caring, but poor, and with the lack of money, the boy knew his way out in the streets; working and landing on any money to keep them alive. 

Years ago, he recalled buying his first sketchbook and charcoal pencil. His first drawing of his working mother, the first painting he sold. Ever since then, the young man basically survived on selling his modest art pieces.

You’ll be a famous artist one day, Sato-chan. He even recalled his mom’s comment, chuckling. 

As a cold breeze drifted, blowing away his smokes, a rushing figure passed by, almost startling Satoshi who quickly straightened. He quietly observed through the darkness as a young man appeared to be standing, gasping and, is he crying?

The man -or boy, judging from his small form- leaned forward, smothered cries escaping his shaking body. He was dressed in an expensive looking silk red kimono, from Satoshi’s observation. Definitely a first class passenger. He furrowed his eyebrows as his eyes scanned the guy, his face barely visible from that angle, but he was certain he saw glistering tears on his pale cheeks. Feeling a sudden rush of blood in his heart, cute, the first thought hit his mind but he shook it away, watching the guy squirm, taking reluctant short steps towards the railing.

Trying not to make any sound, Satoshi stood up, a bit torn between announcing his presence or just leave the guy to his grief. He looked like he needed a moment to himself, but somehow, he just took a step back and kept observing the stranger. The other kept moving, looking quite vulnerable yet delicate, until he reached a spot where moonlight was shining on the deck, and Satoshi’s breath hitched.

The guy was visibly shining, as if stepping out of a peaceful dream. His red kimono waving magically around him, mixed with the chilly night, making him appear like an ice sculpture. His pale skin made his tears shine like pearls, miserably smearing the icy complex. Satoshi just stared and stared, noting the twist in his stomach. 

Breathtaking was the only comment his mind formed. The guy was beautiful, he thought, feeling his cheeks burn as he was shamelessly spying is it considered spying? on the young man.

Satoshi’s eyes kept following the guy, a huge urge to step and hug that powerless form suddenly filled him but he fought it. He knew he was being ridiculous so he kept his place as the other finally reached the railing, his eyes -light brown- he noted, observed the darkness ahead. 

Out of nowhere, Satoshi found himself thinking of drawing the guy, he would look perfect with his flying kimono and the moon above him. He could even see it already in his mind, the guy standing sideway, glancing at him, his kimono slightly sliding off of his bony shoulder, teasing, charming and-

The artist suddenly snapped out of his thoughts when his eyes caught what was happening. His mouth fell open when, simply, the guy who was leaning to the railway, was now leaning from the other side; to the ocean.

What the fuck?!

Panicking, he reluctantly advanced, trying at least not to scare the boy who was taking deep breathes. He didn’t know why but something inside him snapped as well, urging him to go and save that soul, to assure him, to let him know that it’s not worth taking his own life.

The thought itself left him cringing, terrified.

“Don’t do it, please.”  
_________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit short I'm sorry again :(
> 
> PS: I'm not sure if Shongjin was an active travelling port in 1914. Again, this was posted messily from my phone. If it's not correct, let me know. 
> 
> Xx


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2 updates in a row! *throws confetti*
> 
> Though I don't like this chapter at all, here you go ^^

The voice was calm, soft, silky sweet like a newborn’s skin. Just hearing it made him forget all the grief, the pressure. 

As if all was just gone in a blink of an eye.

“Please, you don’t want to do this.” The voice demanded again, this time firmer, closer. Slightly turning his head, ignoring how his hands were freezing, shivering as the gripped the icy burning metal beneath them, Kazunari’s eyes slowly came in view with the voice’s owner.

For minutes, all that was heard was the windy breeze surrounding the back deck, violently fluttering their hair around their faces. As he looked into the other guy’s eyes, the rough beating of his heart began to cease, slowly, little by little, as if he was taken into a peaceful vast garden.

The stranger was watching him, his steps slow but steady, eyes a bit pleading. He looked young, maybe around his age, but from his outfit, he was definitely a low class passenger.

He though had a calming face. Tanned a little, hair kind of messy as it flew around his beautiful face.

“Um… Just come back please.” The stranger pleaded again, slowly presenting a hand to him. Kazunari blinked, his eyes shifting from the stranger’s eyes to the said hand, noting how the fingers were slim and slender, nails slightly long bug neat. Wow, he thought. 

The man kept advancing tardily, a tiny smile forming on his lips, encouraging, but Kazunari snapped out of his thoughts, suddenly remembering the situation he was in, the grief, his helplessness. Tears filled his eyes again and he blinked, taking a heavy breath as he returned to his previous position; gazing at the dark horizon.

“And how would you know what I do want. Don’t presume things, you don’t even know me.” He scolded, sensing the other man tense behind him but he didn’t care. He had lots in his plate at the moment to care about others. 

“Well,” the soft voice argued, “maybe I don’t, but I have a good idea about how cold the water down there is.”

Ok, this made Kazunari stop. The guy looked poor, but it could mean he was out there more than he was. Travelling, living on the streets, who knows, but perhaps he was just distracting him; persuading him not to jump and just end the miserable life he was having.

But then again, he could be right.

“H-how cold?” He inquired, voice softer this time, though he still gave the stranger his back; embarrassed to let him see his tears.

“Below zero I can assure you.” Kazunari gulped as the other resumed. “I went ice fishing one when I was little, fell into thin ice, and I tell you; water this cold like the one down there will hit you like a thousand knives.”

Silence hovered for a while as Kazunari was analyzing what he just heard. He won’t ask what ice fishing was because he read about it in one of his books. The man is probably speaking the truth, judging from his steady tone. Knots began forming in his throat, as slowly, the mere idea of just soaking his toes into that water seemed like the most ridiculous one. 

“So, come on,” the man insisted; his offered palm entering Kazunari’s view, nearly brushing his shivering neck. There was a reassuring heat coming from the man, as if he wasn’t only offering help; he was also sincere about it as well. 

“Just give me your hand and I’ll pull you back.”

Advisedly, Kazunari’s shivering hand left the railways, reaching slowly for the offered hand. It was indeed warm, he noted as the man gently helped him turn around until they were facing each other. 

A sweet smiled formed of the man’s face. Sweet and tender and Kazunari held his breath, feeling his cheeks burn when the man’s warm one brushed his nose.

“I’m Ohno Satoshi.”

“N-Ninomiya Kazunari.”

The man; Ohno, chuckled. “I think you should write it down for me.” 

Hearing the cheerful tease, Kazunari giggled, his cheeks burning more when the man pulled him into his chest as he started climbing the railing. Their eyes met again and Ohno’s smile widened, making Kazunari miss a step as he was climbing.

“Ah!” he gasped as he felt himself flying, his foot sliding quickly as it got tangled in his kimono and, in a blink of an eye, he was suspended from the ship, with only Ohno’s grip on his wrist to prevent his unfortunate fall.

He didn’t recall screaming, but suddenly everything turned too alive; his heartbeats in his eyes, the emptiness under his feet, and a terrifying truth ahead of his eyes. He looked up helplessly, watching Ohno’s firm grasp, trying his best to pull him up.

“It’s ok, I got you.” The man assured, even though it didn’t help cease Kazunari’s terror. He struggled again to pull himself up but failed, as his foot tangled in the layers of his kimono, resulting a louder scream to eco through the night.

“Help me, please!! Help me!” he begged, tears forming in his wide eyes as Ohno reached for his collar, and with a strength he didn’t look like he owned, he just kept pulling the terrified man.

Hurried steps could be heard near them but he couldn’t concentrate, barely hearing Ohno’s voice assuring him, a flow of promises that he won’t let him fall.

Staring into Ohno’s eyes, he gathered all his willpower and his free hand managed to grasp the railway, and, with Ohno’s help, he was steadily being lifter back into the ship.

Shaking, he climbed back as Ohno circled a strong arm around his waist, pulling him closer as he was leaning forward, he hurriedly threw himself ahead, wanting to escape the danger behind and unexpectedly, Ohno lost his balance; falling backwards and dragging Kazunari with him as they landed on the wooden floor.

Footsteps sounded closer and closer, mixed with his wild gasps and his heartbeats, threatening to jump out of his chest. 

He kind of belatedly realized that Ohno was laying on top of him when a loud shout reached his ears.

“What the hell is happening here?!”  
__________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'll just keep Nino's Pov, not sure yet.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 8 is here! *throws confetti*
> 
> I surprisingly found myself a free afternoon just to write this ^^
> 
> I'm a failure when it comes to writing emotions. Meh
> 
> This is not that long, hopefully next chapter will be the planned dinner. 
> 
> Also, a certain young man makes an appearance. *cough*sloppyshoulders*cough*
> 
> Enjoy xx

A moment of silence hovers. 

There was cozy warmth hugging his fragile shivering body. For a moment all his disquiet were gone, then; everything disappeared.

A seaman’s face came into his vision, pulling Ohno off of him abruptly. His eyes were wide, brows furrowed as he examined Kazu on the ground; disheveled and sobbing, tears staining his cheeks. His kimono was torn, the hem pushed up, revealing his knee. A part of his sleeve was also torn as his left shoulder is left exposed. The man disbelieving stared at Ohno; whose jacket was open and two of his shirt buttons were unbuttoned. 

“Stand back and don’t move an inch!” The man screamed as 2 other seamen joined them. One grabbed Ohno while the other rushed to help Kazu off the floor. Kazu was still severely trembling, but his eyes were fixed on the arriving man; most probably a cop and was cuffing the man. Horrified, he wanted to stop it but his voice wasn’t present. 

As if his panic was not sufficient, the rushing form of Ken approached and Kazu felt his throat go drier and drier. His fiancé’s eyes scanned him for a moment before turning to Ohno and, violently, landed a rough slap on his cheek.

“What on earth you were thinking, you filth? Putting your hands on my fiancé?”

Ken’s voice made Kazu’s gasp go inaudible. He made an attempt to stand up, pushing the seaman’s hands off of his shoulders as Ken delivered another slap on Ohno’s face, making him fall robustly backwards.

“Ken, stop! It’s not like that.”

Ken shot another loathsome look at the man on the ground before turning to him. “W-what? “

“It didn’t happen like that; it was an accident.”

Ken’s brows were raised as his eyes shot back and forth from his fiancé to the man; whose lip was no cut and bleeding.

“Accident?”

“Y-yes, I was… um, leaning over to look at the… umm...” Kazu stuttered, nervous with all the eyes fixed on him.  
“The propellers. And I just slipped. And Ohno-san here luckily was there in time to pull me up. I would have gone overboard if not f-for him.”

While all eyes turned to the poor cuffed man, Kazu let out a sigh, his body quivering; the same feeling he always got whenever Ken was around, and he too looked into Ohno’s eyes.

The man was calm, even though he was being accused of attempted rape. He was cuffed and bleeding, not even given a handkerchief. Kazu’s stomach suddenly full of butterflies, he felt his cheeks burn as his eyes unconsciously scanned the man’s tanned arms and his long beautiful fingers pressed to his lip cut.

“Was that what happened, boy?” The cop asked and Kazu’s eyes shot back to Ohno’s, silently begging him to agree. The latter blinked for a moment, but thankfully seemed to grasp what was on his mind. He nodded hesitated, murmuring a small ‘yes’. 

“Well,” one of the seamen commented, “the boy is a hero, then! Well done.”

Faint chatter reached Kazu’s ears while the cop uncuffed Ohno. His panic though returned when Ken grasped his shoulders possessively. “Come on, you must be freezing.”

Ohno’s eyes observed them, causing Kazu to blush. His lips formed to a faint smile while his fiancé’s arm wrapped around him like a giant octopus. 

“Emm, Nijou-san?” The cop demanded faintly. “Perhaps… a little bit something for the boy here?” His hand pointed to Ohno who looked a bit clueless.

Cute. Kazu immediately thought.

“Oh,” Ken stated flatly, reaching his free hand in his pocket and pulling out a 10 Yen coin, nearly throwing it to the poor guy. “Here you go, this will do.”

Kazu stopped on his track, raising an eyebrow at his fiancé. “Really? Is that the price you pull for saving my life?” He shot disbelieving. Ken blinked at him, a creepy smirk plastered on his face. 

“My Kazu is displeased, umm.” He announced, eyeing Ohno carelessly. His smirk grew, creepy, before his laugh filled the chilly air. “Oh, I know how to fix it.”

The rich man glanced at Ohno, as if he was condescending by doing it. “Well, would you like to join us for dinner tomorrow evening? To entertain our group with this heroic tale of yours?” He invited, almost mocking the man who blinked, confused. 

Kazu sort of regretted even being known to be related to Ken. It was totally embarrassing how he was treating people around him as if they were ill-mannered, unwashed street beggars. He sighed, watching Ohno’s puzzled expression, eyeing the couple with a surprised stare.

“Uh… umm, yes, count me in.” He finally announced, fixing his eyes finally at Kazu, as if telling him and him only. The younger blushed, averting his gaze to his feet while Ken hugged him again, dragging him back to warmth.

The only thing that mattered was that he’s seeing Ohno Satoshi tomorrow evening.  
__________________________

Ayaka was busy helping Kazu put on his nightgown. His eyes stared blankly at the wall, lost in today’s events, in the young man he met; that saved his life. It was surprising how a smile always found its way to his face the moment Ohno’s face appeared in his heard. It scared him, but somehow he was excited by the rush in his stomach, his hot cheeks, and the beating in his ears whenever the man’s image is present.

He sighed, barely following Ayaka’s random chatter while she combed his wet hair. 

Maybe life is not that bad after all.

From the mirror in front of him, Ken’s reflection appeared. He was leaning on the doorframe, a dark velvet navy blue box in his hand as he watched him. Surprisingly, his eyes weren’t dark and haunting as always. He was observant.

“Can I have a moment, please?” He astonishingly demanded. Ayaka nodded politely, bowing before excusing herself out of the room. Ken marched towards his fiancé who busied himself with his comb, staring at it as if was the most interesting item in his room.

“I know you’ve been somber lately. And I’m not pretending not to know why.” He softly informed and Kazu didn’t comment; only fixing his eyes to his own reflection while the other handed him the velvet box. Confound, Kazu opened it only to stare at one of the biggest diamonds his eyes ever saw. It was pale yellow, shining in a heart-shaped sculpted necklace. 

“I wanted to save it until our wedding day, but maybe now is a better timing.” Ken’s fingers traced his cheek, pushing a stray hair behind his ear. “Maybe it’ll show you how I really feel about you, Kazu.”

Throat dry, Kazu’s eyes scanned the gift, a bit stunned. It looked too expensive to even think about it; about how much it costs. 

“W-wow, Ken, this is…”

“Yes, a diamond.” Ken finished, proudly. “56 carats. Ordered just for you.”

That didn’t help the young man calm down. Knots increased in his stomach, trying to ignore his fiancé’s fingers on his skin. “There is nothing in the world I wouldn’t give you, anything, just… just open your heart for me Kazu, let me in.”  
Kazu shivered upon hearing the other’s confession, guilt filling his heart while the man was being sincere. It was the first time Ken appeared honest and gentle with him, pouring his unguarded feeling out. Swallowing, Ken’s fingers moved patiently from his cheeks down to his neck, reaching the hem of his gown. His other hand turning the younger’s face to him. Kazu’s stomach twisted, unable to push the bile in his throat away while his fiancé leaned closer, he stopped him with a hand flat on his strong chest.

For a glimpse, Ken’s eyes observed his expression, clearly sensing his rejection. Then he was back; eyes dark and distant, cold stare shifting to his lips, then back to his repelling eyes. Kazu honestly thought Ken would just proceed and get the kiss he was denied, but the man pulled back, and he couldn’t suppress a sigh of relief. Averting his gaze, he turned around, silently watching Ken stare at him for a breath before reticently exiting the bedroom.

Shaking, panic crept to Kazu’s heart when he realized it was Ohno’s face he imagined leaning for a kiss; and not his current fiancé.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I spent an hour searching for info about nightwear in 1900's but failed miserably.  
> Also, a brief humble search notified me that during 1912, Japanese used silver coins, the 10 yen coin Ken gave Ohno is about 20 dollars. (According to Wikipedia, JPY=o.5o USD in 1912.)  
> The necklace I imagined looks somehow like this: https://www.1stdibs.com/jewelry/necklaces/drop-necklaces/magnificent-17-carat-natural-fancy-light-yellow-heart-shape-diamond-necklace/id-j_171214/  
> NOT MINE though.  
> If any info is wrong, correct me. ^^


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally found time to write this! 
> 
> I personally like this one, I think I demonstrated Kazu's feeling better in this chapter.
> 
> This one is longer than the previous chapters, yay! *throws confetti*

For the first time in years, the sun felt warm and cozy.

The young man; dressed in a fancy light blue kimono strode towards the stairs, causing steerage men to turn their heads and stare at him passing the 3rd class gate down into the big yet inferior designed common hall. Numerous tables and chairs stretched before his eyes, kids running between benches, laughing, yelling in various languages. Other old women were occupying a corner; chatting while other men were cheering at an old chanter on a wooden plaza. 

Somehow it felt delightful, alive.

His eyes scanned the crowd, his stomach clenching in nervousness as couple of people glanced at him and whispered, probably wondering what would bring an elegant first class boy to their humble space.

Then he spotted his target.

While voice in the hall faded, he stared as the man occupied a corner, next to two men who were watching the singer, but he had what seemed to be a sketch in his hand; drawing. 

Kazu’s stomach flipped by the breathtaking view of the man; watching in awe as his hand slid gracefully on the paper, all while occasionally smiling and nodding to his companions. 

Hesitated, he took a deep breath, trying to calm the racing beats of his heart. It had been forever since he felt that excited; light, the only sight of the man drew a shy smile on his face and, steadily, he advanced towards the drawing man.

The young man next to Ohno was chatting with a beautiful young lady, whose eyes caught Kazu approaching their table and soon, the rest of the table turned to look at him while others stopped to watch the unfamiliar visitor among them.

When the hall finally hushed, Kazu throat went dry as Ohno slowly raised his head, puzzled, scanning the crowd around him before his eyes laid on him. Feeling blood rush to his cheeks, suddenly losing his confidence as people kept staring at him.

It took Ohno seconds to analyze the scene before he jumped from his seat, gaping at Kazu and a vast smile appeared on his sleepy face.

“Hello, Ohno-san.” Kazu cursed at how low his voice sounded, but Ohno’s smile increased anyway as he approached him. 

“Hello again.” 

Kazu spotted Ohno’s companions beaming at him and his blush increased, shifting his gaze to his feet while his hand fumbled with the sleeve of his kimono.

“Um… Can I speak to you in private?”

Ohno blinked for a moment, and then nodded, gesturing for him to follow him. Trying to calm his chest, he avoided glancing at the man walking him out of the plaza. 

_________________

Two men walked side by side, the sea breeze tickling their cheeks as none of them spoke.

“So,” Ohno began and Kazu flinched. He was still trying to organize his thoughts. He was never this nervous before; usually, talking was an easy task for him, but around Ohno, words seemed to be a bit lost. 

“Ohno-san I… I really feel like an idiot. It took a power of will to come here and talk to you.”

“Well, here you are.”

“I… I just want to say thank you… um… not just for pulling me up, but for covering for me.”

Ohno simply smiled at him, shaking his head. “You’re welcome.”

Kazu bit his lip, feeling like a complete idiot. “Look,” He breathed. “I know what you might be thinking; Poor little rich boy, what would he know about being miserable!”

A short stressful silence hovered before Ohno replied. “Not really.”

“Eh?”

“I’m actually thinking what could possibly happen to this boy to make him think there is no way out.”

Kazu stared at the man, not finding words. “Oh.”

Awkward silence stretched as Ohno seemed to be waiting for him to continue. He tensed, suddenly wanting to explain his misery to the man. He started pulling at his sleeve again, restless. 

“I… well, it’s everything. Everyone, the whole world, I just felt trapped.” His speech was rushed but he resumed, eyes still avoiding Ohno. “I want to keep running and running; I … I don’t know… I want them to suffer… I want to show them how they’re making me feel!”

“By taking your own life?” Ohno rebutted, causing Kazu to feel like an utter loser. He covered his face with his hands.

“Oh god I’m such an idiot.”

“And that clingy octopus; is he one of them?”

The expression made Kazu giggle, sensing a bit of jealousy? in his tone. He pushed a stray hair behind his ear glancing shyly at Ohno who smiled sheepishly. 

“Ah, Ken.”

“Is he your boyfriend?”

“Worse.”

Kazu showed him his right hand; a shiny gold ring with floral vines engraved into it. Ohno gasped; his mouth dropping at it. “Woah, look at that; could have pulled you straight to the bottom!” He teased.

They both laughed, causing the stress to leave Kazu a bit. He couldn’t help but stare at Ohno’s cute laugh; head thrown back, his Adam’s apple prominent on his throat he wanted to trace with his fingers. The man’s eyes wrinkled as he laughed, causing his adorableness to rise. 

Ohno’s laughs ceased but he still looked at Kazu, his eyes scanning his features and making him blush furiously. The young boy averted his eyes, embarrassed, noticing a steward scowling at Ohno who clearly doesn’t belong to the first class deck, but Kazu glared at him away.

“Don’t marry him in you’re not happy.”

“I wish it was this simple.” Kazu sighed. 

“It is.”

“You haven’t seen my world, honestly.”

“I’ll see it tonight.”

Kazu smiled, averting his eyes from Ohno who makes him blush. He wanted to change the unpleasant topic; to talk to the man about anything other than misery. He then spotted the sketchbook Ohno was holding onto. 

“Uh… you… you draw?” You saw him draw you idiot. He mentally scolded.

“Yeah, nothing fancy though.” Ohno opened the book; flashing it in front of Kazu’s eyes.

Nothing fancy? Kazu’s mind screamed as his eyes scanned the pictures shown. He reluctantly took the offered book from Ohno and sat on a nearby bench.

It felt like he was drawn into a fantasy of a wonderland. A breathtaking village surrounded by a tremendous mountain, rice fields and farmers. Another showed a detailed sketch of an old woman’s hand; holding onto a baby’s own.

“Wow… Ohno-san, this-“

“Satoshi.” Ohno interrupted, pulling Kazu’s eyes to him, surprised. “Huh?”

“Call me Satoshi.”

Kazu grinned shyly, returning to the sketchbook on his lap, trying to ignore the warmth of Ohno, no, Satoshi’s body next to him. He flipped through the masterpieces until he stopped, his cheeks burning as he saw the sketch of a naked woman.

The portrait seemed detailed, uncomfortably alive. Kazu unconsciously frowned, imagining Satoshi drawing this from a life model. It felt to intimate and he didn’t like it.

Trying to mask his childish jealousy, he cleared his throat.

“Um, are these drawn from life?” He tried to sound casual and Satoshi hummed.

“Well, lots of people are willing to take their clothes off in Paris.” He explained, grinning.

“But you liked this woman; you used her several times.” Kazu pointed, still annoyed as he flipped through the sketches of the same lady; naked, her hand barely covering one of her breasts.

“Oh, no no, I just loved her hands. They’re beautiful.” 

“I think you might have had an affair with her…” Kazu watched Satoshi laugh loud; smiling a bit even though he was jealous. 

“No, just with her hands.” Satoshi assured, giggling. “Besides, I prefer men.”

The stating made Kazu fly instantly, as if all his life problems were drown in the ocean around them. He grinned brightly, Satoshi mirroring the action. When he felt the painter’s eyes linger on him longer, he smiled, shyly looking away.

Feeling his heart fly out of his chest, his stomach clenched but not in an unpleasant way. Suddenly life didn’t seem as bad as he viewed it; people like Satoshi could make it brighter, fluffier.

They spent most of the afternoon waking around the deck, surprisingly chatting as if they were old mates. Kazu didn’t feel the usual pressure he dealt with during those useless fancy dinners he was forced to attend, those plastic faced people he met. Satoshi was natural, a little goofy but too charming not to like. He didn’t face any trouble speaking to the man who seemed not to care about his social status, which made Kazu feel free, maybe for the first time ever since he was born.

People lounging on deck chairs around them as they paraded, enjoying the late afternoon light. 

“You know, I wish I could be like you, Satoshi-kun; free as it can ever be, travelling everywhere without a single care.”

“It’s not that easy.” Ohno rested on the railing, facing Kazu who was watching the ocean ahead.

“I know, but, just knowing there are no ties, no boundaries, you can just dream and live however you like.”

“And what would that be; your dream?”

“Well, I can be… a street magician for instance.”

Satoshi raised his eyebrows, grinning, startled. “Eh? You do ticks?”

Kazu blushed, embarrassed. “Just some card tricks. I’ll show you one one day.” 

It caused Satoshi to beam at him, nodding excitedly. 

“Though mom doesn’t like it; she says it’s so… not classy.” He hissed, annoyed at the thought before glancing at the horizon again. He could feel Satoshi’s eyes on him, amazingly rejoicing him. “Then what; Mr. Wanderer?” Kazu asked, trying to erase the sudden attention on him, even though he enjoyed it. 

“I don’t know, just thinking about what you said; about freedom.” 

“It is a blessing, really, you should be glad.” 

“Woah, whoa, you’re envying the simple thing I own now?” Satoshi teased and he laughed genuinely, enjoying the adorable pout on the man’s face. He grinned, opening his mouth to speak when his eyes caught the person approaching them, and he froze.

Ninomiya Kazuko’s eyes met her son’s and he paled, watching her unpleased face as she glanced at Satoshi, who noticed his distraction and turned to face the newcomers.

“M-mother!” He squeaked, cursing internally. His mom kept gawking at the poor painter as if she had seen a ghost while her companions stood awkwardly beside her.

Kazu recognized them immediately; the first lady was a thin hawk looking woman in her 40’s; a rich aristocrat’s wife that he didn’t recall the name; but saw her in numerous social events. She was arrogant and cold, from the way she also kept watching Satoshi as if she was faced with a dirty animal. The other man and his wife looked friendlier; Sakurai Sho and Sakurai Mikako. He knew the man, who was a descent but poor hardworking engineer who by luck exploited his little money in a business, only to discover a goldmine, turning him into a filthy rich businessman. Kazuko always called him ‘new money’, especially since his wife, Mikako, was a regular nurse. 

Sakurai smiled genuinely at him, probably sensing the uncomfortable atmosphere. Kazu cleared his throat, turning to his mother, trying to act natural. 

“Um, mother, this… this is Ohno Satoshi.”

“Charmed.” Kazuko mocked clearly, shifting her blaming gaze to her son. Mikako grinned, shaking hands with the painter as her husband introduced them cheerfully. Kazu glanced to see his mom eyeing Satoshi warily and he flinched. The others seemed curious and excited about the man who saved him, awed, but the woman looked at him like an insect, a dangerous insect that should be crushed immediately.

“Well, Ohno-san, looks like you’re a good man to have around, ne?” Mikako praised, causing Ohno to blush and grin. Suddenly a bugler sound filled their ears, startling them.

“Why do they always announce dinner like a damn prison?” Sho disapproved while his wife covered her ears. Kazu glanced at Satoshi who was beaming at him, returning the beam shyly; he turned back to his mother.

“Let’s go get ready, mother?” 

The woman nodded, still eyeing the painter before Kazu had to push his mother away; anxious about the woman’s attitude, but on the bright side, he’ll meet again with Satoshi in a while, which lessened his burden.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No dinner yet, unfortunately! This one was longer than I planned.
> 
> Soon, I promise (if people still read this I mean XD)
> 
> BTW, this is a picture of Nino's engagement ring. https://img1.etsystatic.com/031/0/7144286/il_570xN.603886733_4ixn.jpg   
> It's a vintage designed ring I found on Google; designed for both men and women.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, another one!
> 
> I suck at closing chapters :(

Satoshi watched, slightly disappointed as the young boy pushed his mother away, but not before turning and flashing him a gorgeous bashful smile that made his stomach jump, elated. He knew he was flashing an amusing giggle but he didn’t mind.

“Man, do you have the slightest comprehension of what you’re doing?” Sho’s wife; Mikako’s voice startled him out of his daydreams about Kazu and he turned, observing the couple. 

“N-not really!” He chuckled. Mikako shook her head in despair while Sho eyed him from head to toe.

“Well, you’re about to go into the danger pit.” Sho remarked, lifting an eyebrow. “What are you planning to wear?”

When realization hit Satoshi, he knew how awfully rushed he was acting, but he couldn’t control it somehow, especially ever since he laid his eyes on Kazu. He shrugged, studying how the Sakurais exchanged glances before Mikako nodded to her husband and pulled Satoshi by his sleeve, looking dazzling and keen.

“Then, leave it to me!”  
__________________________

A steward bowed politely, opening the door smartly to the first class entrance. 

Satoshi bowed, murmuring a polite ‘good evening’ as he smoothly passed the gates. Mikako was right; her brother’s suit fitted him perfectly well. Trying to ignore his panicking heart, he took a deep breath and entered the hall.

His breath is totally taken away by the enormous glass dome, with a huge crystal chandelier hanging in the middle. The staircase stretched ahead as women and men, shining in their abundant jewelry and suits. Ohno felt his tension rising, sensing how inopportune he must look like. His eyes scanned men standing with one hand behind their back and he spied; trying to imitate them. Silently noting how they took ladies’ gloved hands and kissed it, featherlike.

It matched Kazu’s stories of tension and frustration. Most people looked solid and stiff, acting automatically with the same smile, same faces and gestures.

Men and women kept coming down the fancy stairs, and as Ohno scanned them, his eyes fell on Kazu.

Air turned heavy around the hall as Kazu walked, almost floating charmingly in a well-fit black suit. His hair was neatly combed behind an ear, his bangs covering his forehead and shadowing one of his eyes. Ohno must have had his jaw dropped because his throat was dry; he swallowed as the boy approached him, grinning timidly.

“Hello, Satoshi-kun.”  
____________________________

Ken took Kazuko’s hand, giggling as he hooked it to his arm and advanced, leaving his fiancé behind. Not as he was complaining though; his mom kept throwing wary glances all the way to their room. He knew she recognized the looks he was throwing Satoshi but he miraculously didn’t seem to give a damn, surprising himself with how bold he felt that evening. 

Walking down the staircase, his eyes attentively searched for the man. What will he be wearing? Suddenly flashed in his mind, he tensed. It would be disastrous if Ohno showed up with his regular clothes, not like he himself cared, but he wouldn’t let anyone give Ohno a strange look while he was around.

Lost in his thoughts, they all reached the bottom of the stairs, stopping to greet a Count and his wife. He then realized he was being watched.

The moment his eyes met Ohno’s, he beamed. It drew unconsciously on his face as Ohno strode, in a surprisingly fitting suit before stopping and taking his shivering hand; lightly kissing the back of his fingers.

Blood rushed to Kazu’s face, beaming, unable to take his eyes off the gorgeous man. His heart elated, he giggled, watching Ohno hooking his hand to the man’s elbow. He averted his eyes; positive he looked like a ripe tomato, and chose to distract himself.

“Em, Ken? Surely you remember Ohno-san.” He called, causing his fiancé and mother to turn. Ken first stared puzzled at him, before his eyes landed on Ohno.

“Woah? Ohno?” He gasped, irony still masking his tone. “You could almost pass for a gentleman!” He commented, almost sneering but Ohno just nodded; beaming.

“Almost.”

Kazu shifted his gaze to see how his mom wrinkled her nose; eyeing the man in his arm as if her son was exposed to a deadly disease. He tried to ignore all the surrounding and focused on Ohno; on how his stomach flipped excited to feel the man’s arm under his fingers; to sense his warmth. It gave him the laze he needed to pass another shapeless night.

They soon encountered Sho and Mikako, who grinned proudly at Ohno. Kazu frowned, elbowing Ohno. “What’s that about?”

“I’ll tell you later.” The man whispered, and Kazu saw his throat moving nervously as he swallowed. He must be nervous. Warmth filled the boy’s chest as he couldn’t avert his eyes away from the man, who was trying hard to keep his head high and proud. He watched how Ohno studied men around them and acted like them; copying their moves and gestures; learning. Unconsciously, Kazu gripped Ohno’s am tightly, his own tension rising as he began to analyze how important Ohno started to mean to him.

Everyone was stunned and amazed with Ohno’s courage the other day, as Kazu introduced him as they walked to their table. He observed, slightly jealous as Ohno kissed women and some men’s hands and bowed, wanting to pull him back and hide him away.

Politely pulling the chair for him, Kazu smiled, cursing for blushing frequently at Ohno’s actions, before the man took the seat opposite to him; only because Kazuko half-pushed Ken to sit next to his fiancé before occupying the other side, tapping her son.

Soon the Sakurais joined their table, causing Kazuko and a countess to share a meaningful look. Matsumoto Jun and Aiba Masaki also arrived at their table, and Kazu caught how Ohno happily watched Matsumoto hold his partner’s hand, and smiled. Several waiters rushed to their table, taking orders, especially since Kagawa and Naohito joined them. 

“So, tell us about the accommodation in steerage, Ohno-san, I heard they are quite good on this ship.” Kazuko demanded from the tip of her nose, taking a sip from her champagne. Mikako rolled her eyes at the woman while Aiba beamed, turning to Ohno who looked tensed at the attention he suddenly got.

“Good, Ninomiya-san. Hardly any rats.”

The table laughed as Sho gestured to Ohno to take his napkin off his plate. 

“Ohno-san is joining us from the third class. He was of some assistance to my fiancé last night.” Ken explained before turning to the waiter beside him.

Whispers were exchanged around the table while Aiba started interrogated Ohno about his life, seeming too excited and bight. Kazu silently observed how Mikako and Sho kept whispering helpful tips to the lost guy, helping him with table setting and food varieties.

His eyes kept glued on the man, studying his handsome features, and that adorable pout when a waiter presented caviar choices to him. Kazu giggled to himself, chest tight but still joyful, his eyes met with Mikako who winked playfully at him; causing his to blush furiously; staring at his food.

Kazuko kept showering Ohno with loud questions about his poor life and home, stressing on those aspects longer than necessary, but Ohno never failed to give her a composed answer, smiling proudly at every word coming out about his lifestyle, about his trips and his paintings. The table seemed amazed, as if they were hearing fantasies belonging to another world; not their rich world.

Dinner ended swiftly and smoothly, while Ken rose from his seat among several other men and women for a smoke. The man turned to Ohno, who was returning something to Mikako who grinned sheepishly at him.

“Well, Ohno-san, want to join us? Or sitting here with the others?”

“No, I’ll be heading back.” Ohno just bowed, already leaving his seat, causing Kazu to frown, disappointed. The others started leaving while the man approached Kazu, his smile reappearing again.

“You have to go?” Kazu didn’t try to mask his disappointed tone and Ohno pouted.

“Time for me to go back to where I belong.” He reasoned, leaning over to take the younger’s hand, kissing it as his eyes stared into his, fixed. Kazu stared, muddled until he felt something in his palm.

Puzzled, he watched Ohno depart, but not before turning to throw him a meaningful glance. As the man left the hall, Kazu comprehended he was holding a tiny piece of paper instead of Ohno’s fingers.

“Make your night count. Meet me at the staircase.”

___________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> According to my brief research, men wore western style suits during 1900's in Japan, during Meiji Era. They sometimes wore kimonos so I thought to let Nino wear a suit for a change.
> 
> I though have no idea about their hairstyles, so if someone wants to enlighten me, feel free ^^


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter! Yay
> 
> FIRST OF ALL, THIS IS IMPORTANT! This chapter contains a non-consensual scene, so please please be prepared. If it makes you uncomfortable, don't read past the party scene!

Sneaking was never his scheme; all his life, Kazu used to obey his mother; especially since his father passed away, leaving them deep into dept. His mom; selfish he thought; and knowing her son was gay, immediately sought of a way to maintain their wealthy status; pushing him into the Nijou family. No discussion, no questions asked, it was simply a decision by the upper hand of the family. He knew well how his mother understood him; she knew by heart how her son was never able to defend himself, to stand and refuse the current situation, and he himself realized how much of a coward he was. It was fruitless to resist when the man spoke about plans of engagement and the woman immediately agreed; forcing her son into the man’s claws. 

She ignored the pained shadows behind her son’s eyes; his dull and stiffy attitude around his current fiancé. She knew all but her terror of losing their name seemed to blind her; relying on her son’s resignation to her demands ever since he was a young boy.

But Kazu’s entire passiveness seemed to vanish the moment his eyes laid on Ohno Satoshi.

Boldly ignoring his mother’s intensive glare, he excused himself from the table; claiming he needed some fresh air. He knew his mom saw through his lie but good luck to her and her fears, he thought. The way those raw feelings Ohno ignited inside him pushed him gusty, the whole world could stand in his way and he would gladly fight them away just to go and meet Ohno.

Crossing the A-Deck foyer, he sighted Onho leaning to the staircase; gazing up, his adorable eyes watching the shiny chandelier. As if he sensed his presence, Ohno turned to him, a blooming smile appearing on his handsome face.

“Now, want to go to a real party?”  
_________

People were loud and alive, raucous laughter filling the third class general room. Kazu’s eyes glowed; scanning an ad hoc band near the piano, stomping music filling his ears, accordion and tambourine. People of all ages danced, drank beer, smoked, laughed and even brawled.

Everyone seemed happy and relaxed.

Ohno cheerfully danced with a 5 years old girl among the crowd as Kazu’s eyes followed him; a bit infatuated. He loved how vivid his heart throbbed, relaxed and uncaring as Toma; Ohno’s best friend kept retelling some funny memories he shared with the painter. 

It was as if he originally belonged to the room.

Toma grabbed drinks from a passing bulky man with a tray full of beer, handing one to Kazu who loosened his bowtie, placing it carelessly aside where his and Ohno’s jackets piled. 

“Sorry it’s nothing fancy-“ Toma paused, gawking as Kazu swiftly gulped nearly half of the pint in one mouthful. Ohno joined them; eyes blown by the same action, causing Kazu to giggle, teasing; wiping his mouth in his elbow.

“What? You thought a first class boy can’t drink?” He questioned, standing up to face the stunned man and smirked, ignoring his heated cheeks at how close Ohno stood, beaming at him.

“Wanna dance?”

Without receiving an answer, Ohno grabbed Kazu’s hand; guiding him to the dance floor.

“W-wait!” Kazu stuttered, suddenly nervous. He had no idea how those people danced, not even a single step but Ohno shook his head; seemingly reading his thoughts. “It doesn’t matter here; no one will judge.” He assured; one hand grabbing Kazu’s waist; drawing him closer to his body. “We just need to get closer; like this.”

Heat from Ohno’s body felt intoxicating; soothing. He smelt like the ocean; salty, wild yet palmy, confident. He fixed his eyes into Ohno’s, blustery to see the emotions reflecting from the other’s eyes towards him, positive his own eyes reflected the same. Gently, his left hand rested on Ohno’s shoulder while the latter took his right; squeezing it. Blushing, Kazu still beamed at the man who nodded; encouraging.

“Just follow me, ne?”

It almost felt as if he was floating; overwhelmed by Ohno’s scent and warmth. The night almost flew in an instant; nothing recalled more that laughter, heavenly joy and Ohno. The sound of the man’s laughter was music to his soul; his oxygen as the danced through the night, everyone around them delighted, free. 

Ohno’s palm on his waist, protective and gentle, contrary to the rough possessiveness of his fiancé, who he totally forgot for the first time in two years. He caught Ohno’s eyes; loving and gorgeous as the man watched him, causing his stomach to stir like a child in a candy castle. He adored how comfortably he buried his face into the man’s strong chest as they danced, as they giggled among the others, the way Ohno leaned to rest their forehead together; feeling the man’s hot breath against his cheek, causing him to fly.

It was the oasis he wanted to spend the rest of his life gulping from.

Little did he know that one particular man was watching him most of the night from behind a third class’ gate.  
____________________________

The man closed his eyed, sipping his fine brandy as he listened to his bodyguard. His nose flared, furious but he kept composed. 

“Ok, you can leave now, Maruyama.” He ordered, handing the man a handful of bills. He listened to the man’s strong steps; trying to control his own ragged breath.

________________

The room was dark, somber as he cautiously shut the door behind him. He still felt light, ears buzzing from spending hours among tapping beats and dancing. His body felt worn but blissful as he advanced, silently towards his room.

“I was waiting for you.”

Stopping abruptly, Kazu froze along with blood in his veins when he heard Ken’s calm voice behind him. He slowly turned to see the man sitting on a leather armchair; face half hidden under the dim light of the lamp beside him, though he could clearly see the man’s dark gaze towards him.

“K-ken, I didn’t… I didn’t see you there.” He barely whispered, gulping, forcing a small smile on his face. Ken kept observing him, increasing his tension. The joy he felt moments ago swiftly started to vanish, as Ken clenched his fist before quietly leaving his seat.

“I was wishing you could come earlier.” The man barely whispered, now standing an inch away from Kazu who shivered, averting his eyes to the ground when Ken leaned closer, breath reeking with alcohol and cigarettes. Ohno’s breath smelled the same but it wasn’t unpleasant; unlike now; the smell caused his stomach to flip, bile in his throat. Ken kept advancing, backing him to his own room door; trapping him. He gagged when the man’s rough hands grasped his narrow hips, steadying him. “I miss you, Kazu.”

“K-ken…” He stuttered, quivering, whimpering when the man ignored him and instead grabbed his wrists; pinning them to the door beside him. 

“What? Do you mind?” Ken nearly hissed, nose flared, causing the smaller man to tremble. “You were okay earlier; in that rat’s hug.” He spitted and glued his strong body to him. Kazu swallowed, terrified, Ken’s smell repulsing. He closed his eyes; calming his trembling body. Ken knew where he was; who he was with. Kazu realized immediately the culprit behind the spying; his fiancé’s personal secretary and bodyguard, Maruyama Tomomi. A bulky and cold middle aged man; probably a former cop or navy, judging from the way he always hid a pistol under his jacket. 

“K-ken, I’m j-just tired.” Kazu reasoned, unconsciously averting his face when the man hummed, leaning to nose his cheek.

“Tired, ne?” He mocked, and Kazu gasped in fear when he felt something hard poke his leg. “Me too, I’m tired, and I need you to help me with it.”

Panic crumbled his defenses when the man roughly turned him around, pushing him against the wall. “N-no, Ken-“

“Shut up,” Ken growled, pinning him with his body. “You will never behave like that again, hear me?” He hissed, tone plastered with fury, even though he still kept his voice low. “You’re my fiancé, if not my husband by law and you will obey me, understand?” He fumed and Kazu nodded frantically, spooked. He felt that man on the verge of snapping; feeling tiny and vulnerable, his previous bravery vanishing into thin air. He tried to resist Ken’s grip but the man just hissed, pushing him further, plastering his body to his small back.

“Ken, please…” He pleaded, eyes blurring with tears but the man grinned wickedly in his ear. He just thrust his hips forward, causing him to gasp. “No, plea-“

“Shhh, it will be good, darling.” Ken whispered, ignoring how Kazu whimpered. He tightened his hold on Kazu’s thin wrists, rubbing his hips to Kazu’s backside. He began sobbing, gagging, wanting to empty his stomach but his fiancé kept going; totally ignoring his tears. His throat dry, Kazu silently shed his tears as Ken groaned and moaned in his ear, feeling the contents of his stomach nearly pushed to his mouth. His body trembled, biting his lower lip to the point of bleeding as Ken’s path quickened and soon he stilled, gasping before he sighed, leaning to kiss the younger’s sweaty neck.

“Good night, dear fiancé.”

Kazu didn’t reply, couldn’t anyway as the pressure to his back finally vanished. He slowly slid to crumble on the floor, curling to himself as he heard a door being shut, leaving him to his own.

He didn’t know how long he stayed against his door, vaguely noticing Ayaka kneeling beside him; a cozy blanket placed around his bony shoulders. He sobbed uncontrollably, shutting his eyes while the young woman rubbed his back soothing, whispering calmingly in his ears but he couldn’t rest. He felt the world crumble again, shattering after a brief ray of happiness. Moments ago he was in heaven, with Ohno, now he was harshly pulled back to the reality he realized he won’t be able to change, he won’t be escaping again, not after what just occurred; Ken’s words and anger; his mother probably will add fuel to the fire the following morning.

“Kazu-sama…” Ayaka whispered, brokenly, she probably witnessed the previous scene, as she always knew how harsh and cruel Kazu’s sufferings were. She was still helpless, as much as he himself was, and probably will always be.  
_____________________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might not be able to update for a while; work, best friend's birthday and I'm horribly sick! Sorry XX
> 
> Also, sorry about the last scene, just needed to show how Ken is a cruel bastard who manages to ruin o̶u̶r̶ Kazu's happiness =(


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh wow! I almost forgot this one!
> 
> I barely found time to update this -if someone still reads it lol- but I'm planning to resume it. I have plenty of ideas for it and a tight schedule. Sigh
> 
> Poorly written, I'm so sorry.

Kazu’s eyes scanned the surrounding; stolid. 

Masked faces roamed; chatted as they had breakfast the following morning. Everything seemed to have regained its pallidness, men and women dressed the same; table setting, mindless chatter. Even food varieties appeared systematic; scheduled.

Ken’s triumph smirk met him and he cringed, darting his eyes to his plate as the man ordered their food. As expected, he swallowed. He felt worn out; emotionally and physically. With barely no sleep the previous night, the young man shivered at those memories he spent the night trying to erase but failing. His eyes still puffy and red from crumbling in his bed most of the night before Ayaka woke him up. She knew; based on the grief masking her eyes while she helped him get dressed. Even his floral morning kimono felt scheduled. 

Watching food being served to his plate, his stomach twisted, he didn’t even feel like smelling food, so he didn’t put an effort and trying to reach for his chopsticks. He observed the surrounding faces, noticing Aiba watching him; concerned. 

”Kazunari-kun, are you okay?” Mikako whispered suddenly, startling the wandering mind of Kazu who flinched, causing his knee to hit the table loud. The table turned to him, increasing the heaviness in his chest as Kazuko frowned, obviously oblivious of anything else but her pathetic chatter on Mikako and her new money status, he thought.

”I-I’m okay...” He stuttered hating the sudden attention. Ken grinned wickedly at him, causing a spark to kindle inside him. Gritting his teeth, Kazu gathered what’s left of his strength and stood up, victoriously witnessing Ken’s smirk fade. It helped his trembling knees, urging the need to see Satoshi. “I need to take a walk.”

With that, he announced, positive that his fiance saw through his meaningful look before he marched his way to the exit, determined.

Satoshi’s face reappeared in his head, soothing the burn his heart suffered from since the previous night. The man’s face helped passing the night of misery, but he needed more; he needed smelling the man’s unique scent, sensing his heat near him; demulcent against his daily ache.

Reaching the main deck, Kazu strolled his way down the stairs; eyes desperately scanning for the man who owns his heart, neglecting the looks he received from third class passengers observing him.

Breathing became easier as he progressed, even though he completely comprehended how perilous his actions were, especially after last night’s events but he wasn’t concerned at the moment. Children ran around the deck, giggling as their mothers watched from aside, chatting carelessly, lightly. Even the faces around him manifested restful minds, no pretending or racing to impress pointless persons. 

There, he spotted the man, and his breath stopped.

Satoshi was seated near the railing, legs crossed and a sketchbook on his lap; drawing. Wind caressed his soft locks and Kazu’s heart swelled, a sudden urge to crumble inside the man’s chest and hide; to extinguish his burning heart. He steadily; hurriedly approached, noting Satoshi’s friend; Toma giggling with two other men while his friend penciled peacefully. 

Kazu suddenly envied the paper Satoshi was lovingly looking at. He wanted to be looked at like that by the man, to see the smile traced on his face as he drew-

”Kazunari-kun!” Toma declared, surprised to see Kazu in their area. He just smiled, eyes desperately darting to Satoshi who still didn’t notice his arrival. 

”Yo, Satoshi, look who’s here.” Toma elbowed the artist who whimpered, glaring at his friend before he lifted his eyes to meet their guest. “Sorry, our man is a bit slow.” Toma teased, making the boy giggle. 

Hurriedly closing his sketchbook, Satoshi rose from his seat, a wide smile marrying his handsome face and Kazu’s heart sobbed, longing to see that smile. “H-hi.” Satoshi welcomed, cheerful, increasing Kazu’s joy. His throat suddenly felt dry as a desert, tensed, losing his words. He watched Satoshi observing him, blushing at the man’s eyes on his nervous features. 

”Can I... Can I join you?” He blurted and Satoshi raised his eyebrows. The festive look appearing on the man’s features scratched away all the dark events he witnessed in his life. The man nodded frantically, offering him a seat. 

The heat coming from Satoshi’s body felt like water in an oasis. He sighed unconsciously, relaxing as the painter flashed him a wide smile. 

”Umm, well, we’ll take a walk, ne?” Toma suddenly announced, leaving his seat while pushing his friends who watched Kazu curiously. He flashed Satoshi a wink before dragging the nosy men away from both of them.

”Sorry about that.” Satoshi beamed, eyes scanning Kazu’s and his smile fainted. “A-are you ok?”

Nodding quietly, Kazu just hummed, eyes scanning the vast sea ahead. A short silence hovered and Kazu sensed the other man studying him; trying to solve his uneasiness. 

”Did something happen?” He insisted, even though he grasped the answer already and that reassured the young man, knowing that at least one person -and an important one- cares about his feeling. 

”Yes, but it doesn’t matter, really.” He acknowledged, eyes still observing the scenery. Satoshi hummed, moving closer until their shoulders touched. “I just wanted to see you.” He added, smiling to himself. 

”Good to know it’s mutual.” Satoshi stated, causing Kazu to blush merry. 

”You can resume your drawing by the way.” 

The statement somehow made the artist flinch. “No, no, I’m fine!” He exclaimed and Kazu turned to catch a blush masking the other’s cheeks, frowning, a teasing smile lifting the corner of his mouth.

”Drawing naked women again?” He teased while Satoshi’s blush increased, unconsciously grasping his sketchbook. Kazu noted how adorable the man looked, his curiosity peaking. “What? Show me! I’m inquisitive.” He ruffly reached for the book and Satoshi gasped, grinning, panicking, trying to protect it by stepping back. Kazu laughed, standing and trying to reach Satoshi’s raised hand with his target. “Come on!” He joked, jumping, noting how close they got; how well he can watch Satoshi’s wide eyes, his glorious smile behind his blush. The man tried saving the book but Kazu mischievously advanced, surprising Satoshi whose eyes blankly darted to his eyes. They shared a short stare and Kazu grasped the opportunity, snatching the book from the man’s hand.

”Ah!”

”Got it!” Kazu announced, teasing, smirking as Satoshi turned crimson red. He observed the beaming young man take a seat, triumph before inspecting his prize.

Sketches filling the book but he saw them previously, he kept turning the pages, throwing a smirk at Satoshi every now and then as the latter reluctantly sat beside him. His eyes scanned and scanned before spotting the last drawing the man was working on.

He knew because it was unfinished but it didn’t matter, because he felt his breath stop abruptly.

The moon shining graceful in a black starry sky, throwing specular rays on a young boy; skinny, dressed in a silky costly kimono, gently sliding off his left shoulder, baring creamy skin as the man’s head turned towards the back, glancing, playfully, charming, standing at what appeared to be the back of a luxurious ship.

It was drawing of himself, he digested.

Silence stretched between them, a rush of cold and hot stroke deeply in his chest, making his slightly dizzy. He reluctantly faced Satoshi who started panicking visibly before he realized his own eyes started to turn bleary.

”I’m so sorry,” Satoshi muttered, averting his eyes to the ground. “This is creepy, I understand, it’s just... I... I’ll rip it right away-”

”NO!” Kazu belted, panicking in turn and Satoshi stared questioning at him, he appeared small, weak and Kazu frantically shook his head. “No, please don’t.” He hated causing obvious pain to Satoshi, he wasn’t disgusted, can never be, not when Satoshi was concerned. He didn’t realize he voiced out his thought until the other man’s eyebrows rose.

”R-really?”

”It’s... It’s actually one of the few best things someone ever did for me.” He explained, sensing heat in his cheeks but he didn’t care at the moment, not when his heart nearly exploded from the flood of emotions towards the man in front of him, mouth gaping at him in utter surprise. “I... You just made one of the darkest days in my life brighter.” He added. 

Satoshi gaped at him for a while before a sweet snug smile plastered on his features. The man sighed, relieved and giggled, nervous. Adorable! Kazu’s mind screamed before he felt tears streaming on his cheeks. He grinned, elated, wiping his face with the sleeve of his kimono. His mother with give him a piece of mind if she witnessed such act, he snorted mentally, but his mother was the least of his concerns as his eyes were glued to Satoshi as the latter started babbling about other random drawings and a story concerning how he decides on his art but he didn’t fully listen. 

Soft chilly breeze tickled his damp cheek, hair fluttering placidly as they spent the afternoon chatting and wandering aimlessly around the deck, aware that at a point, he’ll be returning to the endless torture of his mother and fiance, but the mere presence of Ohno pushed him to apprehend their existence, deciding they will not halt his -even though short- delight moments with Satoshi.  
_____________________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Might update the next chapter in a few days XD


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, That was quick XD
> 
> Longer, more agonizing chapter.

”You look delighted, Kazunari-sama.” Ayaka noted, helping the young man tie his black silk bow tie. Kazu smiled at her, grateful, nodding confidently. 

”Some people made me realize it’s worth it.” He informed, watching a knowing smile marrying her small lips. Guiding him to sit by the dresser, she grabbed the fine combed and started working on his hair. 

”Good to apprehend that. Though,” Her voice suddenly diminished, she threw a hurried look at the door before resuming. “Kazu-sama, you look in love!”

Kazu just grinned, meeting her questioned eyes through the mirror. She couldn’t mask her excitement behind the worried tone, eyes shining frantically as she worked frenzy on his hair. “Good lord, you’re truly in love!” She cheered, hushed still, grinning like an idiot as he laughed.

”Ayaka!” The rough sharp yell of Kazuko abruptly reached their ears, startling the poor maid who flinched, throwing a horrified look at the old woman. 

The room felt darker as the woman approached them, and Kazu’s heart dropped in his feet. Did she hear their conversation? He disfavored the terror he experienced when his mother was approaching, eyes full of fury, darting towards Ayaka who was visibly shaking. 

”Leave us alone.” She firmly ordered, and the young woman’s eyes met his, silently apologizing before hurrying out of the room.

Swallowing, the young man inhaled, in a weak attempt to ease his quivers as his mother stood at his back, resuming Ayaka’s job at combing. 

”Enjoying the trip I presume?” Kazuko quietly inquired, though her hands opposed her smothered tone. Kazu somehow snorted, pushing Satoshi’s cozy smile to occupy his head.

”You have no idea.”

In a blink, the woman snapped, hissing, her thin fingers grasping Kazu’s hair brutally. He gasped, wincing as she pulled his head back towards her before slightly crouching next to his face, eyes flashing visible sparks, nose wide and flaring.

”Are you thinking this is a joke, huh?” She fumed, watching her son’s pained expression but she didn’t seem to care. “Now listen carefully, Kazunari, you are not going to see that boy again, you understand?” 

”Please mom, you’ll have a heart attack if you didn’t stop-” Kazu’s brave attempt was halted again when the woman tightened her grasp on his hair, twisting it roughly. He flinched, heart racing frantically. The woman looked furious like never before, glaring at his reflection through the mirror, challenging, threatening. 

”This is not a game you can play. Our situation is tenuous!”

”I know that, you remind me everyday.”

”Then you’ll stop acting selfishly, understand?” She barked. “While all our money is gone, your precious father left us nothing, nothing but a name, and it’s the only card we have.”

Kazu’s empty eyes stared at nothing, lips trembling in both agony and anger while she resumed. “You’re a perfect match with Ken, it’ll assure our survival, and I’ll make sure you don’t ruin it.”

Snapping in turn, Kazu managed to free himself from her grasp and stood, defensive, fuming in turn. “How can you throw this on my shoulder? And I’m the one being selfish mom?”

Kazuko rolled her eyes, advancing him powerfully. Kazu didn’t apprehend the reason he felt like the weak party, helpless, powerless to her injustice decisions. 

”Ken warned me, and I’m warning you in turn, Kazu,” Kazuko’s tone lowered, still threatening. “You realize we can announce your marriage right away, and halt all this nonsense you’re attempting.” 

A rock dropping in his guts, Kazu stared in disbelief at his own mother’s threat, not grasping her heartless tone as she firmly guided her son back on the chair. “So you have no choice, Kazunari. And you’ll behave like you should. Understood?”

With a heavy silence filling the room, the cruel woman resumed styling the quiet man’s hair, ignoring the empty stare and his stabbing heart as she smirked, triumph, winning.  
__________________

The ship captain leaded the group in a graceful chant, Satoshi spotting through the entry door, Kazuko and her son standing in the middle of the group, singing along.

The young man didn’t seem to notice him, blankly staring ahead as he chanted. Satoshi smiled lovingly, heart fluffy at his sight. He approached the gate, eager to catch the young man’s attention but the stewards at the door stopped his attempts.  
”You’re not supposed to be here.” The man coldly informed, hand pushing Satoshi backwards. He knew he looked out of place; dressed in the third class clothes, but his need to see Kazu eagered him.

”No, I was here yesterday, remember me?” He tried convincing the man who looked unaffected, before he sighted a bulky man advancing towards him. “See, he’ll tell you!”

He recognized the man from the previous night, a firm looking man, apparently Ken’s assistant. Cold and callous face, the man reached the quarrel, eyeing Satoshi rather crudely.

”Nijou-san and Ninomiya-san continue to express their deepest gratitude of your assistant the other night.” The man harshly stated. “They also asked me to give you this.” He reached towards Satoshi, handing him a 20 Yen bill. 

Glaring at the man’s hand, he halted it away, chest tightening. Kazu wouldn’t do that, what’s wrong with that man?

”I don’t need your money, I just-”

”I’m also reminding you that you hold a third class ticket, hence your presence here is not appropriate.”

Cogs in Satoshi’s mind fumed, gaping at the man in fury. No, no, this doesn’t sound right. They did something to Kazu, otherwise, the young man wouldn’t give him some bills to bribe him away. He tried reaching his neck in search for Kazu, eyebrows furrowed. “I need to speak to Kazu-”

The man snorted, handing two more bills at both stewards. “Gentlemen, please make sure Ohno-san gets back to where he belongs.” He dictated, nose high as both men shared a meaningful look before advancing towards him.

”Yes, sir. Come on, you.” They harshly ordered, one of them grabbing Satoshi by his arm. He panicked, furious, trying desperately to free himself.

”No, wait, I need to speak-”

His words were interrupted by the stewards dragging him away from the gate, causing his blood to boil, words disappearing as Kazu wouldn’t see him, looking lost in his own world. His heart swelling in his hurt chest as the first class gate disappeared, the man’s retreating back exited his bleary vision.  
__________________________

The following morning passed peacefully to Kazu, watching his mother giggling, arm hooked to Ken’s arm as their small group toured the ship along Kagawa and Fujiki. Ken’s influence seemed to make everyone around them race to gain the man’s fellowship, joining them and inviting their small family in their small sophisticated circle of nobles. Kazu sighed, uninterested in Kagawa’s tour around his masterpiece, bragging as he presented Watatsumi’s luxurious bridge cabin.

Lurking from the main deck below, Satoshi’s eyes followed the young boy, chest wounded as Toma and Yokoyama, a guy they met on the ship, urged him to leave. 

”Dude, forget it; he’s in the 7th sky, forget him.” Yokoyama argued, looking at Toma for support. “Besides, he already closed the door, man.” Toma added helpfully.

But Satoshi was not fully convinced. The Kazunari he knew -even for this short period- was not to shut him off with some bills, no, it wasn’t his scheme, not after all he recounted during their chatter. “It’s them, I’m positive. They’re keeping him away.”

”And for a good reason!” Toma ranted, frowning. “You don’t know what that asshole fiance is capable of. You mentioned it yourself; the man has powers.”

The painter glanced as his friend, determined, though he knew how accurate he was. 

”I’ll just talk to Kazu; one last time.” He announced, skilfully climbing the B-deck through the gate between third and second class, marching determined to the area below the A-deck promenade.

Toma shook his head in despair, aware of the stubborn ass of his best friend. He exchanged a helpless look with Yokoyama before the latter tsked, crouching down with his hands together as the painter helped himself climbing up, nimbly onto the first class deck, seeking his target.  
_____________________

Fujiki’s steps slowed, tardily, Kazu noted as the man flashed him a gently smile.

”Your mind seems to be wandering, young man.” The man teased, causing Kazu to giggle heavily.

”I was doing the sum in my head, seemingly, forgive me, Fujiki-san, but the number of lifeboats and the passengers capacity don’t seem to match.” Kazu remarked, trying to avert the conversation away of his wandering mind. He overheard Maruyama over breakfast; whispering into his master’s ear that it’s ‘settled’. He comprehended; Satoshi is settled, and it pained him to think about what the man was capable of. 

It didn’t matter to him what his vicious mother threatened him with, the truth was; he was totally aware of what Ken was actually capable of doing; either to him and his mother, or to Satoshi himself. He was never a selfish boy, resulting to think that maybe his mother was actually right being selfish.

Losing her social state would never be easy, he thought helplessly.

”You don’t seem to miss anything, ne?” Fujiki raised an eyebrow, smirking, and Kazu grinned, slightly flinching when Ken’s rattling laugh filled the air. “Not for half, actually, but according to statistics, the deck would look overcrowded so I was over-ruled.” The man explained meaningfully, Kazu noddind, snorting inwardly. Oh, I understand.

”Such a waste, a waste, I repeat.” Ken’s snooty remark reached their ears as he slapped the side of the ship. “It’s unsinkable.”

Fujiki smiled politely at the man before turning to Kazu, noticing his disgusted glare at the rich man. “Sleep sound, young Kazunari; I built a good strong ship, ne?”

Seeing a comforting look on the older man’s face, Kazu just nodded, avoiding glaring at Ken who resumed bragging about everything and nothing and flashed the mannered man beside him a toothy grin. 

As they passed by the boats, Fujiki rejoined the others, leaving Kazu to his thoughts. He sighed again, Satoshi crossing his mind. Just a single day and he missed the sight of him, his comforting gaze. He didn’t intend to jeopardize the painter’s live, knowing he should push his feelings into a well, as usual, and maybe accept his written fate as a part of the Nijou family.

A sudden grasp on his arm startled him, he gasped, ready to oppose when the same man occupying his thoughts appeared miraculously in his sight.

”Wha-”

”Shhh! Come.”

Not leaving and space for argument, Satoshi pulled him, steadily, firmly, and the heat from the other’s hand soothes his racing heart. His mind crowded with various thoughts, questions as Satoshi opens the gymnasium’s door; few meters away from the others and gently tugs the younger man inside.

The dim glass door closes behind them and in a blink, Satoshi traps Kazu by the wall, causing his blood to rush everywhere, trembling, excited and frightened at once. Ken’s face appeared in his head, causing his throat to swell. 

”S-Satoshi, I can’t see you.” He whispered panicked, but Satoshi just shook his head, hands gentle, grasping his bony shoulders. 

”No, Kazu, you can’t.” The painter confirms, calm and peaceful as always and Kazu whimpered, urged to cry. He needed to shut the man up, hug him, kiss the shit out of him just because he needed it. Satoshi’s eyes roamed around his face, studying, calculating until their eyes met. 

Lips quivering, Kazu averted his gaze, he couldn’t look at the man, it ached worse than Ken’s presence, than his mother’s cruelty, than his whole troublesome life and he couldn’t fight it anymore. “Satoshi...”

”Kazu, you’re not effortless or cheap, you’re... Spoiled maybe, a brat, a rebellious, but underneath that you’re-”

”I need to go-”

”No, wait, please!” Satoshi pleaded, tilting his head to meet Kazu’s eyes. He stared back, stared and stared just because he can, inhaling the man’s scent, watching Satoshi watch him. “Let me try again, please...”

Quietness hovered in the still room, Satoshi calculating his words, swallowing. He could feel the slight tremble through the man’s grasp on his shoulders, but also sensed care, delicacy, jealousy as he swallowed too, positive yet fearful of the other’s next words.

”You’re... You’re amazing, Kazu, absolutely gorgeous, and I know I have nothing to offer you, nothing, I know that, but... I feel involved now. I wanna be involved.” 

Satoshi’s voice was gentle, lucid, gazing meaningfully at Kazu’s quivering mouth and back to his eyes. The young boy’s eyes filled with tears, misery overwhelming his core. 

”I... I’ll be okay.” He whispered, defeated, and Satoshi’s face dropped, somehow disappointed. 

”I don’t think so. They’re trapping you, Kazu, and you know it. They’re caging you and you will die if you won’t break free. Otherwise that fire... That fire I like about you will fade away, Kazu.” Satoshi mumbled, tightening his grasp on Kazu’s arms, thumb caressing the fragile boy. 

”It’s not up to you to save me, Satoshi.” Kazu settled, firmly because someone has to. It hurt too damn much, he felt dizzy, disoriented. Satoshi observed his face for a moment, as if searching for a way out but Kazu knew how good he was pretending, he’s been doing it all his life; pretending, hiding. 

Torturous moments departed heavy, then Satoshi’s grasp loosened, causing coldness to hover. Kazu felt weaker, pathetic as the man stepped back, nodding. He wanted to scream, outcry his heart out, reach out for the man and stop him from leaving, hug him maybe, but Satoshi nodded, humming weakly and he needed to leave, to run away from the sorrowful pain. Gathering the remains of his powerless self, he gave Satoshi his back, swallowing his grief as he exited the gymnasium, leaving the only man he needs behind, going back into the snake’s pit.


End file.
